Great Lovers

“I don’t have one night stands, I hold auditions…  And you didn’t get a callback.”
I think you’ve seen the quote on a meme.  You either think that is how sluts sleep at night or your think damn that’s a little harsh.  The fact is you can’t waste time on something not worthy of your time.  Just like running a business, you don’t hire and train people who you know are not going to work out.

I have interviews first, these are usually weeks to months to years long.   I devote a bit of time to these interviews, however, I feel it is important for me.  I don’t want to feel like a slut, I don’t want to sleep with every Tom, Dick, or Harry out there.  I’m choosey and have guidelines and purpose.   If a man makes it past the interview, then I hold auditions.  If a man then passes the audition, it’s generally because he has risen above the last great lover or shows extremely positive potential of pleasure giving.  I have no shame in saying, if it isn’t any good, it isn’t worth my time or effort.  Life is short and one must live it as they see fit.  As an extracurricular, a lover has to be worth me not being with my family for a few hours.

So what makes a great lover?  One upping the prior lover helps, but the man doesn’t know what he’s up against.  It is a little unfair in a way.   I think the feeling goes both ways male and female.  I think to myself, I hope I measure up or I hope I am able to be as pleasurable to him as he is to me.  The long interviews will weed out the self-centered, in it for only themselves, assholes; generally speaking.  And the longer interviews help build an understanding of expectations.  BUT…  It’s still an audition for both the guy and the girl!

Let’s be blunt, roughly the average man has a 5 1/2 inches penis that is about as thick as your longest finger to your thumb touching the tips (1 1/2 inches flat measurement).   Roughly the average woman’s vaginal vault is 3-4 inches, but can be 6-7 inches when in a state of arousal.  Women who chart using “Take Charge of Your Fertility” know the cervix rises and falls within their cycle, so 3 1/2″ to 5″ is where I personally am at (make a mental note of this).

When it comes to impressing a woman, men seem to think bigger is better or seem to think women think this.  I’ve heard size matters, within the context of bigger is better.  And when I say size is not what matters, I’ve been told that’s because I haven’t had the best! As if that is a solid come on line or a way to put a prior lover down.  I will say perhaps I was saying what I meant incorrectly.  Size does matter, but not in the way you may be accustomed to thinking

I have been with long and skinny, long and thick, the medium length with thickness I can’t lick (would not fit in my mouth for a blow job).  I’ve been with so long, it doesn’t all go in even at my highest arousal state of my cycle.  I’ve been with lengths of 4″ (maybe even less), 4 1/2″, 5″, 5 1/2″ 6″ 8″, 10″.  I’ve been with cut and uncut, curvy, not curvy…  Of all the lovers, the 4″-5″ length with average thickness have been the best bang, fuck, lay, cum.  What?  That’s right, the best fucks have been between 4″-5″ in length with average thickness.  And here you thought you had to have a great big penis to be a great lover, wrong!

For a great lover to be great, first it’s physiology, a great lover comes down to science.  Surprise!  Did you expect any other explanation from an analytical woman??? I believe you have to find the right fit.  Each of us are different.  The average is just a range and there are those on either extreme ends both male and female.

As a woman,  I feel thick is where I’m the pickiest.  I will say thickness can be too thick and can be too thin, ha!  That’s helpful!   I’ve had so thick it was painful and distracted the feelings inside due to the stretch on the outside (mind you I have had, without tearing, 9lb babies).   Too thick was Not a great lover.   I’ve had the long and slender with a nice up curve, looked beautiful; probably the most beautiful penis I have seen to this day.  However, a terrible lover, hard to feel, never went in to the base because of the length, so I never experienced that bang of base to mons where the clit gets a little hit.   I’ve had the average 5 1/2 length with a rather less than average slenderness, horrible lover.  Aside from the physiological lack of fit; they lacked love making skills.  Each of these penises owner’s felt their penis was where it was at.  Gentleman, it is not in the penis size.

Great lovers have to have skills!  If you have a great penis fit with your lover, you might get the great lover status with only 1 other skill.  Are you familiar with “4 Hour Body”?  There is a chapter in there every straight male wishing to pleasure a woman needs to read.  I guarantee that if you have that 1 skill and a penis that fits the physiological needs of your woman, you will have great lover status.

Generally speaking, I find older men to be better lovers, but the horrible lovers I’ve had have been 99% older, 40+ up to 50 years old.  Every younger lover I have had, which amounts to two who didn’t make it past audition 2, shame on me for thinking there was potential, failed to be a giver.  They simply thought their dick was enough.  Sorry boys, dick alone will not keep an older woman, we have trained and experienced men that even just have penetration sex better and while that falls short in being a great lover; it’s leaps and bounds above the younger male (don’t worry, you just need time to mature).

In order to one up the prior lover, you will need more than 1 toe curling skill set, 1 skill beyond penetration gets you the second audition.  And I highly encourage the under 40 male explore acquiring the necessary skill sets to really keep his lover satisfactorily fucked.

Most recently, I had the opportunity to have that second audition.  I was one well satisfactorily fucked woman.   This 2nd audition lover already had 2 skill sets, which I experienced months back and really enjoyed.  He one upped himself by  adding in skill set 3 and 4 and 5.  Okay, maybe not that many, nope it was at least 5 fabulous love making skill sets.  If you read my blog, you will note that the Best I Ever Had was quite the great lover for me.  I hate to discredit that lover as he taught me how to get more out of love making and how to achieve immense pleasure; so I won’t.  If it were not for him, well, I wouldn’t have been able to have the experience I had with my new fabulous lover.

As long as I’m sharing, I will lay those skills out.  #1 loves oral and is very good at it, in fact the best oral I’ve had to date.  Any man who can make a woman squirt with oral is a keeper.  (oral is also the one area my husband simply does not enjoy doing, so why force him to?)  #2  goes with #1 and #3 g-spot aware and knows how to hit it during oral and during penetration.  #3 penetration skills, I could feel him in and out.  Hard to explain, but he knew exactly what angle to use and how to really curl my toes! #4 stamina, penetration for a long ass time, but since it felt so good how he was doing it, I didn’t mind one bit.  I was so creamy, it was gloriously erotic.  I was orgasmic  at least twice.  I know how to and when to place my finger on my clit to go with that penetration.  But then it was penetration with my clit against his little bit of “fatty tissue” above his penis!  #5 foreplay, kissing my body, facial hair ticking me, caressing my body, it was heaven.  And here is the surprise for you, his penis is 4″ to 4 1/2″ with average thickness of 1 1/2 flat across measurement.  MIND BLOWN!!!

There is something to be said about the over 45 years old introverted gamer geek who has had oodles of time to read, acquire knowledge, and practice…  (Yes, he is happily married with a grown adult child and grandchild.  He has freedom as I do to have relationships on the side.  All I can say is I hope that his wife enjoys all that as much as I did.)

And that is what makes a great lover!